The Dickhead In Your DM's

You know the type, right? The guy who matches with you on Tinder and immediately asks for your Snapchat or Instagram. Then poof he ghosts. You almost forget he exists… until you're out one night, post a banging pic in a tight little red dress, and suddenly he's back. Full of compliments. Full of "we should hang out" energy. 

Good move guys. Does it ever actually work? I mean It must, right? This play has been run a million times, someone has to be falling for it. Same with the tsunami of unsolicited dick pics sliding into DMs at 10 a.m. on a Wednesday. Surely guys wouldn’t keep sending them if no one was responding. Right?

Men are strange creatures or wait, let me rephrase that. And forgive my “angry feminist” tone, but it’s not men doing this. It’s insecure boys. And I’ll stand on this hill forever: insecurity backed into a corner becomes aggression.

But I genuinely wonder: who are the girls encouraging this? Who sees a random dick pic and thinks, Wow, what a gentleman. Bet he wants to build something real with me. Can't wait to be his wife, he definitely wants to settle down in a house with a white picket fence in the suburbs and have two kids. We'll probably get a dog and a goldfish. He seems so kind and thoughtful, and I can't wait to bring him home to meet my mum. 

Why do some men feel the need to parade their dicks around like they’re God's gift to humanity? A woman couldn’t flash her vagina without causing a public meltdown. But men? They get to shove their junk in people’s faces, metaphorically and sometimes literally, and the world barely reacts. Well except for the poor girl with a dick down her throat, mascara running down her face. But hey, maybe she asked for it, right?

Wrong.

I like to play rough too but here's a fact for you: what happens in the bedroom stays in the bedroom. Disrespect me there, if that’s the vibe we’ve agreed on. But step outside that door and think you can treat me like garbage? Absolutely not.

I’m smarter than you, more successful than you, and completely content without you. If you think for even a second that I won’t walk away you’re so wrong it's laughable. I will cut you down with words you’ll have to Google, block you, delete you, and erase you like you were never there. And I’ll do it without a second thought.

That’s not me being an asshole. That’s confidence, baby. Confidence in knowing I don’t need you, I wanted you. And I can throw you out with the rest of the trash just as easily.